I am originally from Florissant Missouri now living in Southwest Missouri with my wife of 21 years and our cat Junior.
I am a person thriving with multiple disabilities including visually and physically impaired and Autism.
Although I was born Autistic, I did not receive a diagnosis of Autism until I was an adult.
For most of my life I struggled to understand why I felt and acted differently from other people I was around.
I did not know and/or understand why I:
- Had meltdowns and shutdowns
- Struggled with making and keeping friends
- Preferred to be alone than in crowds.
- Hated (and that is not a strong enough of a word) change
- And more
For years, okay for decades, I struggled with many issues that are common in many Autistics including sensory issues: noise and too much visual stimulation is hard on me (between 69% and 93% of people with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) experience sensory symptoms), trouble falling asleep and staying asleep (between 50% and 86% of people with autism experience sleep issues), and experiences severe social anxiety (between 40% and 50% of Autistics experience social anxiety).
Then I started to piece it all together.
In the fall of 2022 my great nephew started to spend a few hours at our house while his mom drove a school bus. My great nephew, at that time, was 4 and just been diagnosed with Autism. I started to read up on Autism to help us connect and communicate with him. It was not long before I saw myself in what I was learning about Autism and in how my great nephew behaved.
The flowing summer I was talking with my primary care physician about the trouble I have always had with noise (in particular with crowds and the noise of a TV, etc) and how I had often worn headphones to block out the noise by playing music that seemed to sooth me (in Autism, it is called self-regulation).
I did not mention Autism, although I was suspecting I was Autistic, my doctor said to me (about my sensitivity to noise) “That is not uncommon for someone on the spectrum”. She said it in a way that sounded like she was saying either “didn’t you know you are Autistic” or “hasn’t someone told you that you have Autism?”
Six months later, I returned to my doctor. I still suspected I was Autistic but was not sure that is what she meant “on the spectrum”. Did she mean Autism or that I am just neurodiverse?
During that visit we brought up the previous conversation. Although she is not qualified to make a diagnosis, she suggested that I find someone who can “help me figure out how my brain works”.
I got myself a counselor and with his help he connected me with a psychologist who performed a screening of Autism.
When I received the results of the psychologist screening, which his findings indicate that I am on the Autism spectrum, I had mixed feelings.
I was both excited and relieved to know that my suspicions of being Autistic were correct. It felt like I found the missing puzzle piece that now made everything about my life, and who I am, make sense to me.
I also felt guilt for feeling happy with the psychologist’s findings. After all, who in their right mind be happy to be diagnosed with Autism – especially with the struggles one must endure with such a diagnosis and the stigma in our society that exists today about Autistics.
Since that diagnosis I have been on three missions:
Mission # 1:
To learn everything I can about Autism, the adult Autism community, and connect with others within the adult Autism community and anyone who supports said community (which is a first for me as I do not often seek out connections with others)
Mission # 2:
To confidently (and unapologetically) share with the world I am Autistic to help break stereotypes Allistics have about Autistics and to be a example (aka role model) for other Autistics of any age to feel comfortable as their authentic Autistic selves.
Mission # 3:
To use my confidence life coaching certification to empower any adult who suspects they are Autistic, self-identifies as being in the spectrum, or has received a late (in life) diagnosis of Autism to discover, develop and grow their self-confidence which will allow them to
- Overcome Ableism
- Advocate for themselves in their professional and personal lives.
- Step outside of their comfort zone
- Thrive as a neurodivergent in a neurotypical world.